more,”

fore I knew what interpretation the world Such readers scorn'd, thou wing'st thy daring flight generally put upon them.

Above the stars, and tread'st the fields of light;

Fame, heaven, and hell, are thy exalted theme,
“ Animula vagula, blandula,

And visions such as Jove himself might dream;
Hospes comesque corporis,

Man sunk to slav'ry, though to glory born,
Quæ nunc abibis in loca?

Heaven's pride when upright, and deprav'd his scorn.
Pallidula, rigida, nudula,

*Such hints alone could British Virgil lend, I Nec (ut soles) dabis jocos!"

And thou alone deserve from such a friend; “ Alas, my soul! thou pleasing compa

A debt so borrow'd is illustrious fame,

And fame when shar'd with him is double fame. nion of this body, thou fleeting thing that So flush'd with sweets, by beauty's queen bestow'd, art now deserting it, whither art thou fly- With more than mortal charms Æneas glow'd : ing? to what unknown region? Thou art

Such gen'rous strifes Eugene and Marlbro' try,

And as in glory so in friendship vie. all trembling, fearful, and pensive. Now what is become of thy former wit and

Permit these lines by thee to live—nor blame humour. Thou shalt jest and be gay no

A muse that pants and languishes for fame ;
That fears to sink when humbled themes she sings,

Lost in the mass of mean forgotten things. • I confess I cannot apprehend where

Receiv'd by thee, I prophesy my rhymes

The praise of virgins in succeeding times; lies the trifling in all this; it is the most

Mix'd with thy works, their life no bounds shall see, natural and obvious reflection imaginable But stand protected as inspir'd by thee. to a dying man: and, if we consider the

"So some weak shoot, which else would poorly rise, emperor was a heathen, that doubt con- Jove's tree adopts and lists him to the skies; cerning the future state of his soul will Through the new pupil fost'ring juices flow, seem so far from being the effect of want

Thrnst forth the gems, and give the flowers to blow;

Aloft, immortal reigns the plant unknown, of thought, that it was scarce reasonable With borrow'd life, and vigour not his own.' he should think otherwise: not to mention that there is a plain confession included of

• To the Spectator General, his belief in its immortality. The diminu- •Mr. John Sly humbly showeth:tive epithets of vagula, blandula, and the That upon reading the deputation given rest, appear not to me as expressions of to the said Mr. John Sly, all persons passlevity, but rather of endearment and con- ing by his observatory behaved themselves cern; such as we find in Catullus, and the with the same decorum as if your honour authors of Hendecasyllabi after him, where yourself had been present. they are used to express the utmost love •That your said officer is preparing, acand tenderness for their mistresses. If you cording to your honour's secret instructions, think me right in my notion of the last hats for the several kinds of heads that words of Adrian, be pleased to insert this make figures in the realms of Great Britain, in the Spectator; if not, suppress it.

with cocks significant of their powers and I am, &c.' faculties.

• That your said officer has taken due no• To the supposed Author of the Spectator. tice of your instructions and admonitions 'In courts licentious, and a shameless stage, concerning the internals of the head from How long the war shall wit with virtue wage? the outward form of the same. His hats Enchanted by this prostituted fair, Our youth run headlong in the fatal snare;

for men of the faculties of law and physic In height of rapture clasp unheeded pains,

do but just turn up, to give a little life to And suck pollution through their tingling veins. their sagacity; his military hats glare full Thy spotless thoughts unshock'd the priest may hear, in the face; and he has prepared a familiar And the pure vestal in her bosom wear.

easy cock for all good companions between To conscio's blushes and diminish'd pride, Thy glass betrays what treach'rous love would hide :

the above-mentioned extremes. For this Nor harsh thy precepts, but infus'd by stealth, end he has consulted the most learned of Please while they cure, and cheat us into health.

his acquaintance for the true form and di*Thy works in Chloe's toilet gain a part,

mensions of the lcpidum caput, and made And with his tailor share the fopling's heart: a hat fit for it. Lash'd in thy satire, the penurious cit

«Your said officer does farther repreLaughs at himself, and finds no harm in wit: From felon gamesters the raw 'equire is free, sent, that the young divines about town are And Britain owes her rescud oaks to thee.*

many of them got into the cock military, His miss the frolic viscountt dreads to toast, Or his third cure the shallow templar boast;

and desires your instructions therein. And the rash fool, who scorn'd the beaten road, • That the town has been for several days Dares quake at thunder, and confess his God.

very well behaved, and farther your said • The brainless stripling, who, expellid to town,

officer saith not.'

T. Damn'd the stiff college and pedantic clown, Awd by thy name is dumb, and thrice a week Spells unconth Latin, and pretends to Greek No. 533.] Tuesday, November 11, 1712. A saunt'ring tribe! such, born to wide estates,

Immo duas dabo, inqnit ille, una si parum est ; With " yea" and "no" in senates hold debates; At length despis'd, each to his field retires,

Et si duarum pænitebit addentur duæ.- Plaut. First with the dogs, and king amidst the 'squires; Nay, says he, if one is too little, I will give you two; Froin pert to stupid sinks supinely down,

And if two will not satisfy you, I will add two more. In youth a coxcomb, and in age a clown.

• To the Spectator. * Mr. Tickell here alludes to Steel's papers against the sharpers, &c. in the Tatler, and particularly to a letter

"Sir,-You have often given us very exin Tat. No. 73, signed Will Trusty, and written by Mr. cellent discourses against that unnatural John Hughes. | Viscount Bolingbroke.

custom of parents in forcing their children | beauty, yet there is none among all your to marry contrary to their inclinations. My various characters of fine women preferown case, without farther preface, I will able to Miranda. In a word, she is never lay before you, and leave you to judge of it. guilty of doing any thing but one amiss, (if My father and mother, both being in de- she can be thought to do amiss by me) in clining years, would fain see me, their being as blind to my faults, as she is to her eldest son, as they call it, settled. I am as own perfections. I am, sir, your very much for that as they can be; but I must humble, obedient servant, be settled, it seems, not according to my

"DUSTERERASTUS.' own, but their liking. Upon this account I am teased every day, because I have not • MR. SPECTATOR, -When you spent so yet fallen into love, in spite of nature, with much time as you did lately in censuring one of a neighbouring gentleman's daugh- the ambitious young gentlemen who ride ters; for out of their abundant generosity, in triumph through town and country on they give me the choice of four. “Jack," coach-boxes, I wish you had employed begins my father. “Mrs. Catharine is a those moments in consideration of what fine woman.”—“Yes, sir, but she is rather passes sometimes within-side of those vehitoo old.”—“She will make the more dis- cles. I am sure I suffered sufficiently by creet manager, boy.” Then my mother the insolence and ill-breeding of some perplays her par “Is not Mrs. Betty exceed- sons who travelled lately with me in the ing fair?” -“Yes, madam, but she is of no stage-coach out of Essex to London. I am conversation; she has no fire, no agreeable sure, when you have heard what I have to vivacity; she neither speaks nor looks with say, you will think there are persons under spirit.”_" True, son, but for those very the character of gentlemen, that are fit to reasons she will be an easy, soft, obliging, be no where else but on the coach-box. tractable creature.”_" After all,” cries an Sir, I am a young woman of a sober and old aunt, (who belongs to the class of those religious education, and have preserved who read plays with spectacles on,) " what that character; but on Monday was fortthink you, nephew, of proper Mrs. Doro- night, it was my misfortune to come to thy?”_"What do I think? why, I think London. I was no sooner clapped into the she cannot be above six foot two inches coach, but, to my great surprise, two perhigh.”_“Well, well, you may banter as sons in the habit of gentlemen attacked me long as you please, but height of stature with such indecent discourse as I cannot is commanding and majestic.”—“Come, repeat to you, so you may conclude not fit come,” says a cousin of mine in the family, for me to hear. I had no relief but the “I will fit him; Fidelia is yet behind- hopes of a speedy end of my short journey. pretty Miss Fiddy must please you."- Sir, form to yourself what a persecution “Oh! your very humble servant, dear coz, this must needs be to a virtuous and chaste she is as much too young as her eldest sis- mind; and, in order to your proper handter is too old."-" Is it so, indeed," quoth ling such a subject, fancy your wife or she, “good Mr. Pert? You that are but daughter, if you had any, in such circumturned of twenty-two, and Miss Fiddy instances, and what treatment you would half a year's time will be in her teens, then think due to such dragoons. One of and she is capable of learning any thing them was called a captain, and entertained Then she will be so observant; she will us with nothing but filthy stupid questions, cry perhaps now and then, but never be or lewd songs, all the way. Ready to burst angry. Thus they will think for me in with shame and indignation, I repined that this matter, wherein I am more particu- nature had not allowed us as easily to shut larly concerned than any body else. If I our ears as our eyes. But was not this a name any woman in the world, one of these kind of rape? Why should there be acdaughters has certainly the same qualities. cessaries in ravishment any more than You see by these few hints, Mr. Spectator, murder? Why should not every contriwhat a comfortable life I lead. To be still butor to the abuse of chastity suffer death? more open and free with you, I have been I am sure these shameless hell-hounds depassionately fond of a young lady (whom served it highly. Can you exert yourself give me leave to call Miranda) now for better than on such an occasion? If you do these three years. I have often urged the not do it effectually, I will read no more of matter home to my parents with all the your papers. Has every impertinent felsubmission of a son, but the impatience of low a privilege to torment me, who pay a lover. Pray, sir, think of three years: my coach-hire as well as he? Sir, pray what inexpressible scenes of inquietude, consider us in this respect as the weakest what variety of misery must I have gone sex, who have nothing to defend ourselves; through in three whole years! Miranda's and I think it is as gentleman-like to chalfortune is equal to those I have mentioned; lenge a woman to fight as to talk obscenely but her relations are not intimates with in her company, especially when she has mine! Ah! there's the rub! Miranda's not power to stir. Pray let me tell you a person, wit, and humour, are what the story which you can make fit for public nicest fancy could imagine; and, though view. I knew a gentleman who, having a we know you to be so elegant a judge of very good opinion of the gentlemen of the Vol. II.

39

army, invited ten or twelve of them to sup

We seldom find with him; and at the same time invited

Much sense with an exalted fortune joined. two or three friends who were very severe

Stepney. against the manners and morals of gentle

MR. SPECTATOR,—I am a young woman men of that profession. It happened one of nineteen, the only daughter of very of them brought two captains of his regi- wealthy parents, and have my whole life ment newly come into the army, who at been used with a tenderness which did me the first onset engaged the company with no great service in my education. I have very lewd healths and suitable discourse. perhaps an uncommon desire for knowledge You may easily imagine the confusion of of what is suitable to my sex and quality; the entertainer, who finding some of his but, as far as I can remember, the whole friends very uneasy, desired to tell them dispute about me has been, whether such the story of a great man, one Mr. Locke, a thing was proper for the child to do, or (whom I find you frequently mention)

that not? or whether such or such a food was being invited to dine with the then lords the more wholesome for the young lady to Halifax, Anglesey, and Shaftesbury, im- eat? This was ill for my shape, that for my mediately after dinner, instead of conver- complexion, and the other for my eyes. I sation, the cards were called for, where am not extravagant when I tell you, I do the bad or good success produced the usual not know that I have trod upon the very passions of gaming. Mr. Locke, retiring earth ever since I was ten years old. A to a window, and writing, my lord Angle coach or chair I am obliged to for all my sey desired to know what he was writing: motions from one place to another ever

Why, my lords,” answered he, “I could since I can remember. All who had to do not sleep last night for the pleasure and to instruct me, have ever been bringing improvement I expected from the conver-stories of the notable things I have said, sation of the greatest men of the age.

” and the womanly manner of my behaving This so sensibly stung them, that they myself upon such and such an occasion. gladly compounded to throw their cards in This has been my state until I came tothe fire, if he would his paper, and so a con-wards years of womanhood: and ever since versation ensued fit for such persons. This I grew towards the age of fifteen I have story pressed so hard upon the young cap

been abused after another manner. Now, tains, together with the concurrence of their forsooth, I am so killing, no one can safely superior officers, that the young fellows left speak to me. Our house is frequented by the company in confusion. Sir, I know you men of sense, and I love to ask questions hate long things; but if you like it you may when I fall into such conversation; but I contract it, or how you will; but I think it am cut short with something or other about has a moral in it.

my bright eyes. There is, sir, a language • But, sir, I am told you are a famous particular for talking to women in; and mechanic as well as a looker-on, and there- none but those of the very first good-breedfore humbly propose you would inventing (who are very few, and who seldom some padlock, with full power under your come into my way, can speak to us without hand and seal, for all modest persons, regard to our sex. Among the generality either men or women, to clap upon the of those they call gentlemen, it is impossimouths of all such impertinent impudent ble for me to speak upon any subject whatfellows: and I wish you would publish a soever, without provoking somebody to say, proclamation, that no modest person who "Oh! to be sure, fine Mrs. Such-a-one has value for her countenance, and conse- must be very particularly acquainted with quently would not be put out of it, presume all that; all the world would contribute to to travel after such a day without one of her entertainment and information.” Thus, them in their pockets. 'I fancy a smart sir, I am so handsome, that I murder alí Spectator upon this subject would serve for who approach me; so wise, that I want no such a padlock; and 'that public notice new notices; and so well-bred, that I am may be given in your paper where they treated by all that know me like a fool, for may be had, with directions, price two no one will answer as if I were their friend pence; and that part of the directions may or companion. Pray, sir, be pleased to be, when any person presumes to be guilty take the part of us beauties and fortunes of the above-mentioned crime, the party

into your consideration, and do not let us aggrieved may produce it to his face, with be thus flattered out of our senses. I have a request to read it to the company. He got a huzzy of a maid who is most craftily must be very much hardened that could given to this ill quality. I was at first dioutface that 'rebuke; and his farther pu

verted with a certain absurdity the creanishment I leave you to prescribe. Your ture was guilty of in every thing she said. humble servant,

She is a country girl; and in the dialect of T. 'PENANCE CRUEL.' the shire she was born in, would tell me

that every body reckoned her lady had the

purest red and white in the world: then No. 534.] Wednesday, November 12, 1712. she would tell me I was the most like one

Sisly Dobson in their town, who made the miller make away with himself, and walk

Rarus enim ferme sensus communis in illa
Fortuna

Juv. Sat. viii. 73.

afterwards in the corn-field where they MR. SPECTATOR,—I am in the condiused to meet. With all this, this cunning tion of the idol you was once pleased to huzzy can lay letters in my way, and put a mention, and bar-keeper of a coffee-house. billet' in my gloves, and then stand in it she I believe it is needless to tell you the opporknows nothing of it. I do not know, from tunities I must give, and the importunities my birth to this day, that I have been ever I suffer. But there is one gentleman who treated by any one as I ought; and if it were besieges me as close as the French did not for a few books, which I delight in, I Bouchain. His gravity makes him work should be at this hour a novice to all com- cautious, and his regular approaches denote mon sense. Would it not be worth your a good engineer. You need not doubt of his while to lay down rules for behaviour in oratory, as he is a lawyer; and especially this case, and tell people, that we fair ones since he has had so little use of it at Westexpect honest plain answers as well as minster, he may spare the more for me. other people? Why must I, good sir, be- • What then can weak women do? I am cause I have a good air, a fine complexion, willing to surrender, but he would have it and am in the bloom of my years, be mis- at discretion, and I with discretion. In the led in all my actions; and have the notions mean time, whilst we parley, our several of good and ill confounded in my mind, for interests are neglected. As his siege grows no other offence, but because I have the stronger, my tea grows weaker; and while advantages of beauty and fortune? Indeed, he pleads at my bar, none come to him for sir, what with the silly homage which is counsel but in forma pauperis. Dear Mr. paid to us by the sort of people I have Spectator, advise him not to insist upon above spoken of, and the utter negligence hard articles, nor by his irregular desires which others have for us, the conversation contradict the well' meaning lines of his of us young women of condition is no other countenance. If we were agreed, we might than what must expose us to ignorance and settle to something, as soon as we could vanity, if not vice. All this is humbly sub-determine where we should get most by mitted to your spectatorial wisdom, by sir, the law-at the coffee-house, or at Westyour humble servant,

minster. Your humble servant, SHARLOT WEALTHY.'

“LUCINDA PARLEY.' Will's Coffee-house.

A Minute from Mr. John Sly. • MR. SPECTATOR,-Pray, sir, it will

• The world is pretty regular for about serve to fill up a paper if you put in this; forty rod east and ten west of the observawhich is only to ask, whether that copy of tory of the said Mr. Sly; but he is credibly verses which is a paraphrase of Isaiah, in informed, that when they are got beyond one of your speculations, is not written by the pass into the Strand, or those who move Mr. Pope? Then you get on another line, city-ward are got within Temple-bar, they by putting in, with proper distances, as at are just as they were before. It is therefore the end of a letter, l'am, sir, your humble humbly proposed, that moving centries servant, ABRAHAM DAPPERWIT.'

may be appointed all the busy hours of the

day between the Exchange and Westmin*MR. DAPPERWIT -I am glad to get ster, and report what passes to your hoanother line forward, by saying that excel- nour, or your subordinate officers, from lent piece is Mr. Pope's; and so, with time to time.' proper distances, I am, your humble ser- Ordered, vant,

THE SPECTATOR.' That Mr. Sly name the said officers, pro“MR. SPECTATOR, I was a wealthy and morals.

vided he will answer for their principles

T. grocer in the city, and as fortunate as diligent; but I was a single man, and you know there are women. One in particular came to my shop, who I wished might, but was No. 535.] Thursday, November 13, 1712. afraid never would, make a grocer's wife. I thought, however, to take an effectual Spem longam reseces.

Hor. Od. xi. Lib. 1. 7. way of courting, and sold her at less price than I bought, that I might buy at less price

Cut short vain hope. than I sold. She, you may be sure, often My four hundred and seventy-first specame and helped me to many customers at culation turned upon the subject of hope in the same rate, fancying I was obliged to general. I design this paper as a speculaher. You must needs think this was a good tion upon that vain and foolish hope which living trade, and my riches must be vastly is misemployed on temporal objects, and improved. In fine, I was nigh being de- produces many sorrows and calamities in clared bankrupt, when I declared myself human life. her lover, and she, herself married. I was It is a precept several times inculcated just in a condition to support myself, and by Horace, that we should not entertain a am now in hopes of growing rich by losing hope of any thing in life, which lies at a my customers. Yours,

great distance from us. The shortness and • JEREMY COMFIT.' luncertainty of our time here makes such a

kind of hope unreasonable and absurd. The fellow, that would never set his hand to grave lies unseen between us and the ob- any business during his father's life. When ject which we reach after. Where one his father died, he left him to the value of man lives to enjoy the good he has in view, a hundred drachmas in Persian money. ten thousand are cut off in the pursuit of it. Alnaschar, in order to make the best of it,

It happens likewise unluckily, that one laid it out in glasses, bottles, and the finest hope no sooner dies in us but another rises earthenware. These he piled up in a large up in its stead. We are apt to fancy that open basket, and, having made choice of a we shall be happy and satisfied if we pos- very little shop, placed the basket at his sess ourselves of such and such particular feet: and leaned his back upon the wall, in enjoyments; but either by reason of their expectation of customers. As he sat in this emptiness, or the natural inquietude of the posture, with his eyes upon the basket, he mind, we have no sooner gained one point, fell into a most amusing train of thought, but we extend our hopes to another. We and was overheard by one of his neighstill find new inviting scenes and landscapes bours, as he talked to himself in the follying behind those which at a distance ter- lowing manner: This basket,' says he, minated our view.

cost me at the wholesale merchant's a The natural consequences of such reflec- hundred drachmas, which is all I have in tions are these, that we should take care the world. I shall quickly make two hunnot to let our hopes run out into too great a dred of it, by selling it in retail. These two length; that we should sufficiently weigh hundred drachmas will in a very little while the objects of our hope, whether they be rise to four hundred, which of course will such as we may reasonably expect from amount in time to four thousand. Four them what we propose in their fruition, thousand drachmas cannot fail of making and whether they are such as we are pretty eight thousand. As soon as by these means sure of attaining, in case our life extend lam master of ten thousand, I will lay aside itself so far. If we hope for things which my trade of a glassman, and turn jeweller. are at too great a distance from us, it is I shall then deal in diamonds, pearls, and possible that we may be intercepted by all sorts of rich stones. When I have got death in our progress towards them. If we together as much wealth as I well can dehope for things which we have not tho- sire, I will make a purchase of the finest roughly considered the value of, our disap- house I can find, with lands, slaves, eupointment will be greater than our pleasure nuchs, and horses. I shall then begin to in the fruition of them. If we hope for enjoy myself and make a noise in the world. what we are not likely to possess, we act I will not however stop there, but still conand think in vain, and make life a greater tinue my traffic, until I have got together dream and shadow than it really is. a hundred thousand drachmas. When I

Many of the miseries and misfortunes of have thus made myself master of a hundred life proceed from our want of consideration, thousand drachmas I shall naturally set in one or all of these particulars. They are myself on the foot of a prince, and will the rocks on which the sanguine tribe of demand the grand vizier's daughter in marlovers daily split, and on which the bank- riage, after having represented to that rupt, the politician, the alchymist, and pro- minister the information which I have rejector, are cast away in every age. Men of ceived of the beauty, wit, discretion, and warm imaginations and towering thoughts other high qualities which his daughter are apt to overlook the goods of fortune possesses. I will let him know at the same which are near them, for something that time, that it is my intention to make him a glitters in the sight at a distance; to neglect present of a thousand pieces of gold on our solid and substantial happiness for what is marriage night. As soon as I have married showy and superficial; and to contemn that the grand vizier's daughter, I will buy her good which lies within their reach, for that ten black eunuchs, the youngest and the which they are not capable of attaining; best that can be got for money. I must afHope calculates its schemes for a long and terwards make my father-in-law a visit, durable life; presses forward to imaginary with a great train and equipage. And when points of bliss; grasps at impossibilities; and I am placed at his right hand, which he consequently very often ensnares men into will do of course, if it be only to honour his beggary, ruin, and dishonour.

daughter, I will give him the thousand What I have here said may serve as a pieces of gold which I promised him; and moral to an Arabian fable, which I find afterwards to his great surprise, will pretranslated into French by Monsieur Gal- sent him with another purse of the same land. The fable has in it such a wild but value, with some short speech: as, “Sir, natural simplicity, that I question not but you see I am a man of my word: I always my reader will be as much pleased with it give more than I promise.” as I have been, and that he will consider •When I have brought the princess to himself, if he reflects on the several amuse- my house, I shall take particular care to ments of hope which have sometimes passed breed her in a due respect for me before I in his mind, as a near relation to the Per- give the reins to love and dalliance. To sian glassman.

this end I shall confine her to her own Alnaschar, says the fable, was a very idle l apartment, make her a short visit, and talk

3